8-29-11

5:23a.m.

Good morning! Woke up about 20? minutes ago went to the bathroom, then picked at my face for a questionable amount of time. It could’ve been 20 minutes, could’ve been five. I’m not sure. But when I heard mom’s alarm clock go off, I realized how late it was. I knew I probably wouldn’t get back to sleep, tough I will still try once I finish this passage. But I know I won’t. I might lay here for about ten minutes, then give up on it. Then I’ll get up, and begin my day officially. I’ll do my hair, possibly change. Maybe even wander out of my room, or just sit and watch TV. but it will all be done so I can waste a bit of time. I just want to make it until they leave, until I’m alone. Then I can weigh myself. That’s what I’ve been getting at this whole time, I now realize. I really need to know how much I weigh right now. You have no idea…  I guess I’ll try to go back to sleep for the 25 minutes I have left until my alarm goes off, and maybe this time I’ll actually get back to sleep.

6:00a.m.

 I didn’t even last ten minutes lying down. Today is going to be Hell… I’m going to watch music videos for a while, then actually start on my hair. I hate that I have over 40 minutes to wait… why can’t they leave earlier, both of them….

On another note, I’m so hungry right now. I have yogurt in the freezer I made last night, that’s for breakfast. It should be frozen solid so I can savor it today. That’s probably all that I will have until I can get home from school. Ill try to restrict later too, maybe just not eat. But if I do, I can have either a bowl of cereal (100 calories) some broccoli (75) or if I feel I can go on only lettuce, I’ll have cup or two of that (30-60). I really need to/want to/have to work out today. There’s no question about that. How much I do depends on how much I eat though. If I do well, I might just go to the pool for a few ours. I might do that and work out, just because. Then I would eat less to… I think I’ll go to the pool after school, especially if it’s hot. I might have another little bowl of yogurt before that, but nothing more.

I figure if I swim, I can easily burn over 300 calories per hour. I'll count it as 100 per hour to be safe. So if I swim for two hours minimum, then work out and burn 300 calories, I can burn 500 calories. If I eat everything that I’ve just listed, ill only ingest about 315 calorie. This sounds good, because even with all the food, I’ll be in the negative, and I don’t plan on eating it all. I might even go walking to waste some time, and that’s even more calories burned. I might lose a pound or two today if everything goes as planned…

I’m actually excited about today now. I think I’ll start on my hair.

7:30a.m.

On the bus now. Didn’t have time to eat yogurt, but its probably for the best. I gained .2lbs from yesterday. Its odd how I can lose on a day when I eat 1325 calories, and gain on a day when I eat 860. Whatever.

Super hyper. With three hours of sleep, and two cups of coffee in me, today is going to be fun, or at least interesting.

The stairs in school are killing my legs. It’s a good thing.

I should burn off the 25 calories I’ve ingested as sugar, probably by the time I reach school. Today I’ll be running on empty. Also a good thing.

My hair actually looks good today.

That’s it for now.

9:40a.m.

I’m so sick. The coffee is screwing with my stomach so bad right now. Earlier, it was so much worse. Right after I wrote the last entry, it hit me. The bumps were torture. I almost puked. When we got to school, as I was walking I thought I would collapse, my legs about to give out on me. I’m better now, but still feeling like crap.

12:40p.m.

Lunchtime!! Except I'm not eating. I’m sitting in my 5ht hour class browsing the web. My stomach is still super upset, so I'm not going to eat. I probably wont eat later either, maybe the yogurt if I have to eat something or I think I can handle it. Maybe this will be the start of a fast, as I've already gone almost 18 hours without eating. By the time school gets out, it will be 20.5ish. Its going to be left-overs for dinner, so if I don’t eat, its unlikely that it will go noticed. Maybe ill pretend to eat my yogurt or a bowl of noodles and butter. I shouldn’t have too, though, hopefully.

P.S. The rest of today's post will be added tomorrow ASAP. again, sorry for the inconvenient way I've been posting

P.P.S. All coments and other postings by all of the lovely people will probably be looked at and replied to on sunday's only. Sorry.